I’ll support this.
Shit my husband says (when our marriage explodes)
- Him: If you fell in love with someone else, I'd be happy for you.
- Him: Our relationship changed when you lost your job.
- Him: Why couldn't you just shut your mouth and suck some dick to keep your job?
- Him: You can't come to house, I'm dating someone.
- Him: Yes, she's been to the house, I wanted to show it to her and have her meet the dogs.
1998-2011 : Letting Go
ps
Adultery has at least two major impacts on the lives of the children of the adulterous parent.
Cheats the children of their sense of security.
Complicates the child’s future & creates life long scars.
Most clinicians will tell the impact of adultery on the children has been all but overlooked. But, interest is gradually growing (Annette Lawson Institute for Research on Women and Gender at Stanford University).
Research indicates children grow apprehensive and insecure as a result of behaviors demonstrated by adulterous parents.
There is a sudden inattentiveness as the adulterous parent focuses attention on someone outside the nucleus of the family.
uncertainty and anxiety develops as a result of parents pulling away to answer phone calls behind closed doors.
Absences from the family for purposes of a vague nature.
The child may exhibit any of the following characteristics of heightened anxiety.
clinging
bedwetting
thumb sucking
temper tantrums
fire setting
night terrors
It is interesting to note that the characteristics demonstrated by the child of an adulterous parent are extremely similar to those of a sexually abused child.
Children who grow up with a parent who had an adulterous relationship are less likely to be able to maintain adult monogamous relationships. They are also more likely to have higher divorce rates than the rest of the population. These children are more likely to become teen parents. These children are more likely to have difficulty at school. These children are more likely to have behavioral and psychological problems
To the ‘other’ (my anger letter)
I’ve remained silent far too long, and in order for me to move on, I need to speak my heart.
When I experience this grave and profound heartbreak, nausea wells up in the pit of my stomach as my body shutters uncontrollably in extreme shock, as suddenly the world I knew and the life I have spent years building does not actually exist. This physical manifestation will occur again, randomly, uncontrollably or every time thoughts sparked by anything ever shared, like goals, plans, photos or experiences. I feel emotionally raped, raw and exposed, vulnerably floundering from an assault that precipitated from the very one I loved and trusted the most. From the very one who spoke repeated and reassuring words and even in the presence of God, vowed to protect and honor me.
Obviously since your displaced desires have been met, are you happy with your prize? Did you get what you thought you deserved, or do you egoistically believe you have the power to prevent him from betraying you? He has already displayed his values openly to you as he carefully hid them from the light of day, certain not to tarnish his essence in my view. He left a supportive, sick and unemployed wife. Not exactly a great resume for someone you want in your life. Still you chose to accept any scrap of a relationship pursued as an arbitrary accomplishment. Again, I ask why? Statistically most adulterous men will choose to stay married to his wife because a divorce will automatically cut his wealth in half, plus the expense of a court battle. These men obviously and sadly value money over a list of values that a loving, hard working wife only hoped they had. And if you think you were the only one he was pursuing, I’m here to tell you - you were the only stupid woman that took the bait. He had his pole in every pond it turns out. So, you should know, you weren’t special. You were just desperate for attention, attention from a sociopath.
I hold _________ equally responsible for imparting grief to me, my family and his but I shall not minimize your actions as you may fool an unsuspecting wife, you may fool an unremarkable man, but there is no mistaking your knowledge of the person you’ve become and only you have to reconcile that. Your tactless lack of judgment may have many negative implications but one thing I can assure you that this one will go down in history and live forever in the hearts and the minds of myself, my family and his. If I knowingly caused this kind of destruction to another human being, I would not be able to live with myself and would probably take my life. This is something you and ________ refuse to acknowledge, take responsibility for in any way shape or form. You are adults, you know what’s black and white and what’s right and what’s wrong.
How do you look at your children and believe you are worthy of their love? Seriously, are the values you clearly lack - something you want to teach your children as they grow and learn living a life that is filled with love and care for others? Or will your children just learn from you ‘be selfish, put yourself above others, right or wrong, and if it feels good, do it!’ It’s obvious you were raised that way, and the circle/cycle shall continue. The apple never falls far from the tree. You should blame your parents, _______ does. You are the worst kind of woman. The kind that other women shake their heads at and talk about with shock. You may think I have no right to judge you, think again. You took part in the destruction of my life, the unending pain of two families and tons of friends. Men are weak. I came to you from the beginning - woman to woman. You are pure evil. Classless. And I feel for your children. And with my short experience with their father, you’re children really have very little chance of growing into good people.
Most asked question? How does a mother of 4 have time to fuck around with a married man????
Answer: A selfish, superego driven mother that puts herself before her children. The worst kind of mother.
Happy Mother’s Day.
Somebody that I used to know. Gotye w/Kimbra
